Demetra (dmarnerou) wrote,

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Sleepless in Nicosia...

I just cannot sleep right now. There are so much going on in my mind right now. So many thing have happened during the past two months. Where shall I start from?
This semester was really tough. If I had failed even one course I would have to do another extra year to complete my studies. Thank God, I passed all four courses... I still have one semester to go. It will pass too (I think to myself).
What else happened? I came home one day and my roommate was gone. For good... I knew that by the end of May she would move out but the bitter feeling of walking into an empty home was something I never thought I would experience. This past year our relationship was tense. We hardly talked to each other and we became allienated. When we finally decided to aproach one another to solve our differences, we both realised how foolishly we both acted. We cried in each other's arms for the year we had lost. We had a strange way of communicating. I would not tell her that I was in a difficult situation and she would sense that, hold me in her arms and I felt better (and vice-versa). I loved her in an inconcievable way and the night she had gone I stayed in her room, crying and reminiscing all the good and bad times we had together.
What about my family? I never was too good at expressing how I felt about someone. Over the years, I had created in my mind this flawless figure for my father and I worshiped him. He meant the world to me and I concider everything he did wise and correct. I somehow gave all my attention and love to him and I took my mother for granted. You know that thing they say: You really don't appreciate something you have until you've lost it. It's true...
Just a few weeks ago my mother felt an excruciating pain in her spine. Both the doctors she visited detected some sort of fluid between her joints and they speculated that it might be a tumor. We did not know if it was malignant or not. A speciment had to be retrieved for analysis but the spot was too difficult to reach. There was a chance of hearting vital nerves resulting to her partial or total infirmity. There was one doctor left who was an expert on such problems. He diagnosed it to be just joint inflammation and he prescribed some medication which would disolve it. When we told him what the other doctors diagnosed he just said that they were young and inexperienced and the paniced as they had never seen anything similar before during their medical pracise. He advised my mother to follow his treatment and if it failed he would proceed to do an autopsy on a speciment of the fluid. My mother is currently following his treatment and she's feeling better. At least she can now sleep at night. I hope and pray that the doctor is right. He has to be right. I can't loose her right now. I love her too much and I haven't told her yet. There are so many things I want to tell many things...
What else is great in my life? My baby is facing legal problems. Two years ago he agreed to be the guarantor when his older brother wanted a loan. His brother paid the first two or three instalments and that was it. Now the bank declared him bankrupted and they want the money from Jack and his mother. The worst thing about this is that they don't agree in Jack and his mother paying in monthly instalments. They want the whole amount... The only way out of this mess is if both Jack and his mother sue Takis. Then they would be declared bankrupted but Takis not anymore so this way he will be forced to pay. But another problem rises: If Jack is declared bankrupted then no bank will give him a loan to continue his studies. It's a pretty messy situation. Takis is trying now to raise the whole amount so that Jack can pay, in order to avoid all this mess. I really don't know if I can help. I offered to talk to my dad about lending Jack some money but Jack won't hear about it. He's just so stubborn some times. The hearing of the case is on the 27th of this month. In 2 days... I pray that everything works out ok...
So much for my perfect life. I try to keep myself busy at work to keep my mind off these problems. I just hope that there better days coming up and all these will be nothing but faided memories.
I really need a friend right now...
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